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unwritten_icons
09 June 2009 @ 05:27 pm


Mother overdosed on drugs today. I don't know what kind. Don't care. Her grandchildren were in the house and found her having a seizure on the floor, naked. They were with her a few hours before my 7 year old nephew managed to call someone on her cell phone. She's in the hospital now.

I'm so sick of her bullshit.

I don't know when I'll be able to update again. Too much shit and drama going on in my life.

(At least I can always turn to my ED..)

 
 
unwritten_icons
27 May 2009 @ 04:48 pm


Here I am stuffing my face again..

Why can't I just eat like a normal person and enjoy it? Eat without imagining all the food - even a goddamned peach -going straight to my hips/stomach/thighs?

Why do I have to count calories? Why do I have to practically kill myself every night at the gym? Why do I have the compulsion to weigh myself after everything I eat? Honestly, why am I doing this? Why do I hate myself so much? Why does my entire life revolve around three things: Calories, food, weight..instead of things like  boys, my friends, my favorite TV show?

Why did I swallow two spoon fulls of salt the other night..knowing it was going to taste awful, knowing I'd hate it, knowing it was bad - just so I could puke up that ONE chicken wrap I had? Why do I go to bed every night and think "Fat cow ate too much, lay in bed like the lazy pig you are, try harder tomorrow, try harder, be better!" Then, a moment later, I think: "What am I doing to myself?"

Every day is a constant battle inside my head. I can't get rid of it. I can't stop the thoughts that tell me how fat, worthless, and stupid I am, nor can I stop the thoughts that revolve around food. Can I afford that? How many calories is that? Will it make me gain weight? I ate x amount of calories today, no, I can't afford it, look away, don't smell it, don't look at it, don't think about it. You do not want it. Your growling stomach is a traitor. It wants you to eat when you don't need to.

God, how did I get this way? I think back on my life three years ago - my biggest concern every night was - nothing. I was depressed, I was suicidal, but it didn't plauge my every thought and action. Why does the human race have to be cursed with such things? If there is a god out there, I bet it just likes torturing us for its own amusment.

 
 
unwritten_icons
26 May 2009 @ 10:33 pm
Random nonsense from the tired depths of my brain :L


Full circle
Life becomes a thin line
Which becomes a blurred picture
Which becomes distorted glass
Which morphs into thoughts
That morph into actions
Actions blur the picture
The picture blurs the truth
The truth is in the bones
The bones distort the mirror
Which turns into words
Words become truth
Truth becomes fear
Fear becomes obsession
Obsession becomes life
Life becomes..
A thin line.
 
 
unwritten_icons
16 April 2009 @ 10:33 pm
Yes, I'm putting this journal and all other projects on hiatus. I don't know how long.

I'm not going to go into detail. I'm just going to say that I need help. I just spent the last few minutes cleaning myself up in the bathroom. I won't need stitches for the cuts.

I don't know what exactly I'm going to do now. But I thought those of you who've downloaded my resources and looked at my art deserved to know why I'm on a hiatus. Thanks.
 
 
unwritten_icons
22 March 2009 @ 11:02 am


Download HERE at DA

Set of 15 100x100 textures with a floral theme.

Made in CS4, image pack included, have fun!
 

 
 
unwritten_icons
14 February 2009 @ 03:53 pm

I made a 1024x768 valentine's wallpaper, 2 different versions. Hearts/background made by me, brushes by  Yasny-chan at Deviantart. Enjoy!

Read more... )
 
 
unwritten_icons
04 February 2009 @ 04:33 pm
 
Download HERE at Deviantart

14 valentine's themed brushes.

Made in Photoshop CS4, image pack included.

Did I add enough pink? Haha.

All the brushes (except the lipstick and boxes) were made from images of stamps, so I didn't draw them.
 
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unwritten_icons
28 January 2009 @ 11:01 am

I was bored yesterday and made this. Base from Doll on the Hill Factory.


Under the cut )
 
 
unwritten_icons
24 January 2009 @ 09:25 pm

Download HERE at DA

Set of 20 100x100 dark, grungy textures. Have fun using them.

Made in Photoshop CS4, image pack included.

Credit is nice but not required.
 
 
unwritten_icons
19 January 2009 @ 10:52 am


 
Download HERE at DA

Set of 25 tea-themed brushes. Includes tea sets, teacups, lace, and various food brushes.

Made in CS4, image pack included.
Credit is nice but not required. Enjoy!
(Also, if you're not going to download the brushes, don't click on the fricking link. I don't like seeing that my brushes/textures have been viewed 400 times and only downloaded 80 times. Thanks.)
 
 
unwritten_icons
19 January 2009 @ 09:36 am
Okay..so why does my latest brush set have 406 views and only 80 downloads? If you don't think you're going to download it, don't click on it and save me some anxiety and disappointment, will you? Why do people do this anyway? Is it because I used CS4 to make my brushes and you just don't want to make brushes from the image pack? *sigh*
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unwritten_icons
18 January 2009 @ 08:36 pm

 
Download HERE at DA

Set of 20 vintage inspired photoshop brushes. Most items I made brushes of would have been found on a woman's vanity in the victorian era.

Made in CS4, image pack included.

Credit is nice but not required.
 

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unwritten_icons
17 January 2009 @ 02:13 pm
 
Download HERE at DA

Set of 20 high resolution smear brushes.

Made in CS4, image pack included.

Credit is nice but not required. Enjoy :)


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unwritten_icons
17 January 2009 @ 12:26 pm
My muse went on vacation and just came back last night, so I made a new layout style. Hope you like it. I'll have a new brush set up this weekend.
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unwritten_icons
29 November 2008 @ 06:44 pm

I've made 23 Final fantasy VII and Kingdom hearts II icons. Unfortunately the bauble icon tables are still not working :L

[x] Credit and comments are nice
[x] Numbered for a reason, if taking, please tell me which ones
13 KH
10 FF


Preview:


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unwritten_icons
28 November 2008 @ 10:28 pm

Download HERE at Deviantart

Set of 25 100x100 icon textures with a vintage theme.

Made in CS4, image pack included

Credit is nice but not required, enjoy!
 
 
unwritten_icons
16 November 2008 @ 08:58 pm


Not really related to anything, but I thought I'd try my hand at making a pixel doll - turned out better than I expected. The chair didn't turn out quite like I wanted, but I was just doing it for fun.
 

Credit for doll and chair base to www.stvgr.net/dhf/ 

Btw, it's supposed to be Felicity Worthington from Libba Bray's Gemma Doyle series.

 

Shades of blue and gray )


 

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unwritten_icons
14 November 2008 @ 05:45 pm
 
Download HERE at DA

Set of 25 100x100 icon textures of a space wallpaper I made from scratch :) Lots of colors.

Made in CS4, image pack included

Since I made this with my own graphics, I'd like credit, please! Thanks and enjoy.
 
 
Current Mood: hyper
 
 
unwritten_icons
08 November 2008 @ 05:18 pm

I've seen a lot of argument since Twilight was first spawned published on comparing it to fanfiction. Yes, there are hordes and hordes of horrible fanfiction that should have never seen the light of day; and at the same time, I see a lot of fanfiction running circles around Meyer's garbage. Maybe it's because I'm a fanfiction writer myself, and being compared to that load of trash offends me beyond measure, or maybe it's because I just don't like the book. The characters in Twilight are very liken to Mary sues and Gary stues, and the plot (or lack thereof) reminds me of tween romance full of bad sex and even worse development. There are plotholes, plotholes, plotholes! And I've never seen any author manage to fill over 400 pages worth of crap in one book, but here, Meyer excells.

Now, compare that to some of the more notable fanfic(s) you've read. Are the characters tollerable, written in a good way, and dare I say it, developed? Does the plot contain a good beginning, rising action, climax, and falling action? Is the writing good enough that you don't want to shove something sharp into your skull? Not many plotholes, right? Is the length reasonable and helps add to the story? If you've answered yes to these, then that fanfiction is most likely better than Twilight. Is it fair to compare it to Twilight? No. I can think of many, many fanfictions that could blow Meyer out of the water.

Well, just my thoughts on it. I would flesh this out more if my hands weren't going numb. Continue on, girls and boys.
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unwritten_icons
07 November 2008 @ 05:23 pm

Why do people like portraying Genesis as the villain/rapist/sadist/batshit crazy/psychopath in some fics? Dude, I don't know what version of the game they played, but Genesis didn't strike me as any of the above. A little on the edge, I'd say, but not a serial rapist or sadist or whatever. His character and why he did such things were explained in a believable manner, at that. I keep finding fics with this scenario: Poor little Zack Fair gets raped and or tortured by mean evil Genesis and Angeal comforts Zack with love and kisses, and they live happily ever after while Genesis, the cockroach of Shinra, rots in a cell or dies a horrible painful death. Tell me, does that sound at all canon to you?

First, if someone tried to rape Zack - nothing short of Sephiroth would be able to beat him. Because he is one of the fiercest characters I've come across. Yes, he's sweet and honest and all that, but he is also a SOLDIER with enhanced strength, hearing, yatta yatta yatta and I don't see him curling in a fetal position and letting it happen. I see him biting and screaming and cussing and beating the shit out of anyone who tried. And don't get me started on what Angeal would do to said person himself.

Second, yes, Genesis teeters on the edge of insanity, but he is not sadistic or psychotic. I've only taken 4 months of Psychology but I know that much. When people say there's a fine line between insanity and genius, they were right. And by the way, I use the term insane loosely - for one you have to be BORN insane and can't simply develop it, and two, compare Genesis to people like Jack the Ripper or Hitler - I don't see anything in common at all. Yet his character is explained in the series - why he did what he did, what made him what he was, etc etc. I don't expect someone who was raised in that sort of environment could grow up to be healthy minded. Especially after the whole degradation scenario. His obsession with LOVELESS, too, is explainable - assuming that his parents didn't pay much attention to him, it's plausible to say that he took the story to heart and followed it almost religiously, because that had influence on his life where his parents didn't. He honestly believed himself to be the hero in the story, and while that does sound odd, it's not fair to call him insane or psychopathic for that. Obsessed, yes, but not psychotic. At some point in our lives, don't we wish to be someone else?

I don't know why I have to defend his character so often, because if you think about it, his character is easily explainable *sigh*

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